Mommy Advice Needed

image

So this time around, I need advice about a situation with Bestie.

Here’s the dillema as I see it:

Little Man is a “titty baby” in every way possible. He wants his mommas boob and nothing else. This is wearing Bestie out. She home schools Turkey and there are days that Little Man makes this damn near impossible.

That being said, I also feel that Bestie is half responsible for perpetuating this. She allows him to use her as a pacifier, she picks him up at any little fuss, she takes him from Loud Mouth, me or anyone else holding him when he first starts to fuss. She complained to me about Loud Mouth not bonding with Little Man… but from what I saw, she doesn’t allow him to. She never even let me try and soothe him, except for when she was in the shower and didn’t know he was fussing. How can Loud Mouth (or anyone else) soothe him and bond when she takes him away to pop the boob in his mouth?

So, I was wondering:
1. Why is Little Man like this? So clingy to her? Are her actions doing this?

2. How can I approach her about this without sounding “too intrusive”? Or should I say anything at all?

3. If I do speak to her about it, what options (if any) should I suggest to help Little Man not be so clingy?

image

Advertisements

Turkey Talk

image

If you have read my Cast of Characters page, you know Turkey is my hilarious “niece”.

She cracks me up constantly. After spending the past few days with her… I have to share some “Turkey Talk”.

Talking to Bestie:
“Mom, I love Bubba, but I want a sister too.”
“No. We are done.”
“Well, I will just wish on a star like I did for Bubba and YOU WILL get pregnant again! ”

-After sassing back to Bestie:
Bestie: Don’t be smart!
Turkey: (honestly confused) But, I am smart…
Bestie: Dont be a “Smart-ellic” is what I meant!

Dancing to the Just Dance game-
“This is my JAAAM! ”

Also while playing Just Dance-
(Talking to Butthead)”C’mon Uncle ____, feel the beat with us! ”

Annnd my favorite from this weekend:

-Comes into living room where we are sitting around chatting-
Turkey:(Raises hands in “announcement” form) “Everyone- I have found us a new holiday to celebrate as a family!”

Bestie: Really? (Eyebrow raised and smirking- we all agreed later we were expecting a made up holiday)

Turkey: (very serious) Yes. It is called, Chanukah! (Very proud looking)

Me: (trying not to laugh) Turkey, hunny, we don’t celebrate Chanukah.  We are not Jewish.

Turkey: (disappointed) But you get to light candles and get presents for eight days!

Bestie: Aw, hunny, we celebrate Christmas. Jewish people celebrate Chanukah, remember talking about Jewish people in your lessons?

Turkey: (sigh) Okayyy. Yes. (Sulks away)

Haha! Poor Turkey. She perked up after she realized her Elf wouldn’t come if we didn’t celebrate Christmas. She loves that dang Elf!

Hope you enjoyed Turkey talk! I see MIL tomorrow, so I might have another No Filter for you! ♡

image

Best Friends

Bestie and I FINALLY cleared the air. Apparently I thought she didn’t want/need me around and she thought I didn’t want to be around because I was mad or something. Turns out we didn’t want to “bother” each other and were too stubborn to pick up the phone.

I have spent today chatting with Bestie, snuggling with Little Man and laughing with Turkey. My heart is so full today.

I also feel very proud that I was able to give Bestie a few breaks during the day. Little man does not like being away from mommy, even a few minutes- but apparently I put the aunty magic on him and was able to keep him happy each time I gave Bestie a break.

But as you might have guessed-baby fever is baaaaaaack!

image

It’s back with a vengeance! I couldn’t help but hear my uterus scream at me everytime I held him-“Yeah, holding a baby… feels so NATURAL doesn’t it! ”

*pipe down, baby carriage… I get it! Shhesh*

For more Baby Fever posts, check out my Favorite Topics Page!

image

Warm and Snuggly

So warm.
So sweet.

I went and saw Bestie and Loud Mouth yesterday and of course, Turkey (their daughter) and lil man!

I got to hold and snuggle lil man! Loud Mouth handed him over again later in the evening and I got to rock Lil Man to sleep!♡♡

I leaned back and rocked him while he laid on my chest. It was UH-MAZ-ING! He was so warm and snuggly! His fuzzy lil hair smelled of baby wash. All the sweet lil sounds he made. It was intoxicating!

Baby Fever is baaaaaaa-aaaack!

image

What’s A Girl To Do?

As many of you saw, I have been struggling to cope with Besties new role as a mommy x2.

I took a cue from the comments you lovelies made and reached out to see how things were going. Turns out, she’s quite busy. Not in the “my hands are full” kind of busy, but already bouncing around to her cousins who have just had babies to have play dates kind of busy.

Now, we (Butthead and I) usually accompany her, Loud Mouth, and their daughter to Trick or Treat. This year, I get this reply- “We already have plans, maybe we can hang next weekend” When I replied “oh, okay.” I get the consolation text of “you can join us if you want, my cousins and I are taking the kids to the square.”

Sigh. Am I being unfair to feel like an outcast? I feel like I am losing her to other mommy friends/family. It’s like this rollercoaster of emotions:
“she doesn’t need me.”
“Maybe she does, she is just busy”
“she’s not too busy, she just needs other mommies- not me.”

HELP! How can I shake this? Or am I just going to have to deal with the fact that being a mommy 2x over changes the game so much… we just won’t be able to connect like before?

I am scared of losing her… but I feel like I’d sound whiny or bitchy to if I say anything. I dunno what to do. Any advice?

image

Halloween

I love Halloween!

Maybe I am just a big kid, but I LOVE it. I am kinda disappointed my scary post didn’t get an overwhelming approval. I could write stories like that all day! It’s so fun! But, I digress.

Halloween- the most awesome holiday (in my opinion) so often gets overshadowed by the ever expanding Christmas season. I love Christmas too, but my gosh… I DO NOT want to see Santa and his cheery little minions in SEPTEMBER/OCTOBER!

Seriously! Even one of my neighbors has already decorated their house for Christmas! No kidding! BEFORE HALLOWEEN! Imagine this scene, if you will… trick or treating with your kids. You approach the next house and your kid asks “mommy, why is Santa in this yard!? Is Santa scary?”

I know this will happen! Poor kids! These people will confuse all the littles! And you can’t exactly look at Jr and say- “Sorry honey, some people are morons!” Hmph. Again… I digress.

So, Mommies! I have a question.
How many of you still do the good old fashioned Trick or Treat? House to house like in the good ol days? Bestie and I argued over this last year. I was complaining about “Trunk or Treating” and other various cop-outs that parents do now a days.  She gave me the dreaded… “You’ll understand…” response. Pft.

I want more opinions.
Trunk or Treat– “better and safer” or “wussification cop-out?”

image

You are My Sunshine

image

I remember my Momma singing this to me. ♡

I heard a commercial use it the other day. It made me smile, then I got sad. A little pang of sadness washed over me for two reasons.

One, I miss her dearly. Next June she will have been gone for ten years. I have found that somedays, there is just no substitute for the comfort of laying your head in your Mom’s lap and crying out all your sorrows. Momma used to let me do this and would stroke my hair and just listen. Oh, how I miss that comfort.

Two, as I stare down this long road to my own motherhood, I realize that having your own mom to guide you is priceless. My heart breaks that I do not have that. I have come to the realization that I do not know things about my own birth.  I know the sweet and simple. I know what’s written in my baby book. I do not know things about her pregnancy. I do not know those personal stories that mothers share with their daughters when they are pregnant.

I asked my aunt if she knew anything. Unfortunately, my mom didn’t confide things like that to her. I wish I had asked more questions, but I never knew I would only have 18 years with her. Cooking, relationships, motherhood, all things I thought I would have more time to discuss and learn from her.

I hate that I get jealous. I see mothers helping their daughters as they grow into wives and mothers. Here I sit, little orphan Annie, outside looking in. Like the movie scenes, hand on a rainy window- looking into a warm,  cozy, happy scene from the cold, damp exterior. It doesn’t last long, but my heart breaks more each time I experience it.

The worst lately was not being there in the room for the birth of Besties son. I UNDERSTAND she wanted her mom. That is important. It just hit me hard, because I WILL NOT have that option. It was a double sting.

I miss her. As I finish writing this, I feel the sting of tears in my eyes. I must hurry, before my vision blurs. So, I will leave you now. Til next time♡

image

I Can’t Seem to Help It

image

Baby on the brain. Craziness. Baby fever. Bio clock ticking.

Whatever you wish to call it, I’ve got it, bad! My fiance caught me yesterday and called me out.

We were helping out friend move. We were gathering final bits and I noticed his sister was leaving behind a very nice pack n play stuffed full of baby stuff. (Her son is 2 now)

So, this compulsion took over. I had to have it. I don’t know WHY- but it called my name. Loudly! I hop to and begin digging out the stuff. I was carefully tossing things I wanted into one pile and tossing the rest into a trash box. I was almost done, finish line in sight, when my fiance walked by. (Damn)

“Wha-what are you doing?” He almost kept walking but then as if an imaginary hook caught him, he paused and pondered.

“Cleaning this out, it’s a niiiice pack n play” I whispered.

His eyes narrow. “Why?!”

“It’s nice and…” I stammer

“We DON’T have a baby!” He’s flabbergasted.

“…but Baby J (besties baby)…” I mutter then he cuts me off.

“Already has one… put it back! Help with the stuff THEY want!” And he huffs off.

Shot down. Dammit. And made to feel crazy on top of it all. I DID get a bag of clothes to give to my bestie though. Ha. He shut up on that one. Anyhoo… til next time… ♡♡♡

image

Perfect

TEN TINY FINGERS♥
TEN TINY TOES♥
ONE LITTLE MIRACLE♥

Okay. So my previous posts about my rollercoaster relationship with my best friend seem pretty harsh. Perhaps the green eyed monster got me a little too well over these past weeks. I’ll admit to that.

But, today. Oh, today. I met my nephew.
♥Oh, be still, my heart! ♥
♡♡He is perfect♡♡

All bad feelings were set aside to enjoy this day with my best friend. My “sister.” I cannot wait to feel the swell of emotion and love for my own child. For it must be greater than that I feel for my niece and nephew and, today, the love I felt, seeing that precious face. Wow.♥

→→I.Can’t.Wait←←

image

Appreciation

Even after my last post, my mind is still storming around like a two year old with it’s feelings hurt. I still have venting to do. So, therefore, you get a double dose of thought today.

Cutting to the chase- I feel underappreciated. My best friend and her man are expecting #2 anyday now and I just left from there after a false alarm. I bend over backwards for them. I won’t go into specfics, but lets just say, if it wasn’t for me- they wouldn’t be living so cushy.

When we left, I felt like an unwelcomed guest. No, thanks for coming… sorry for the false alarm or sorry you had no rest because you slept on a love seat in a room with no air conditioning. It is agrivating to say the least. I am helping you when I SHOULD be looking out for number one.

After this kid arrives, I need to buckle it down. I am fulfilling my last promise to them- watching their kid while they are in the hospital… then I am done with miss nice lady. I need to focus on getting my FIRST here. No longer going to put my dreams on the back burner to facilitate your dreams.  Period. I need to focus on me. I’m tired of doing for others and then getting treated like its not enough but see them achieve the things I want while they stand on my back. It’s over… I am done.

Ahh. My shoulders feel lighter now.

image