Woke up from the most vivid dream I’ve had in a while. In my dream, I screamed and yelled and cried at Butthead. I woke rather upset. As I pondered this, he poked his head into our bedroom to see if I was awake.
My face must have betrayed my thoughts, as he immediately asked what was wrong. Feeling silly, I told him. It was just a dream… I needed to shake it off. However, instead of assuring me that the dream was wholly preposterous… he began a statement that began, “In the interest of full disclosure…” and finished it with what felt like a gut punch.
And I cried. Big, sopping tears. Crinkled face, ugly cry. Bare your soul cry. Face your fears cry. Made him cry, cry.
We spent the rest of the day in bed, talking while wrapped in each others arms. There was more crying. But there was also laughter, kisses and more “I love you”s than had been said in a long time. Something that could have tore us apart just brought us closer together.
For the first time in a long time we actually listened to each other. We forgot ourselves and asked what did the other need? It was a remodel. A tidying. The earth may have shook, but our foundation is strong.
I could have been angry… shielded my hurt with harsh words. I chose to be raw. Be real… show my hurt and see my faults too. In turn, my love has grown stronger and wiser. I don’t regret crying.
I'm Trying... 