Real

Today it was real.

I went back to work. The place we worked together. The place that just under a month ago we mourned the loss of one of our patients.

Today I had to stop telling myself, “I have to tell her…” , “need to remember that to tell her…” .

Today I realized she wouldn’t call to check in. She wouldn’t be asking me what I wanted for lunch.

Today my lil man I take care of said, “We sure will miss her…” and with a lump in my throat I squeaked- “yes…yes we will.”

Today it was too real that she is really gone. I can’t stand this hole in my chest.

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