It took me 28 years to figure this out. I had to make sense of it all. This ache I feel, the emptiness, it has to be explained! This is the worst ache I have felt since losing my own parents ten years ago.
I have concluded that we are sent to this earth with a heart that is not ours to keep. Through out our days here, we break off pieces to give to others for safe keeping. Sure, some are returned to us at the end of relationships- sometimes in need of repair. Other times we give out small pieces that are never returned.
The pieces that matter most are given bit by bit over time. We give those pieces to those who surround us the most. Who we experience life with and who we care for the most. People who we admire, the ones who we share hopes and dreams with. The people we call family- blood or not- are the people who carry the majority of our heart.
When we lose these people, pieces of our heart fly back to Heaven with them. This is why my chest hurts so. Another huge chunk of my heart has flown to Heaven and the ache is deep. As with most wounds, yes time will heal it. Time cannot, however, remove the mark on my soul.
A scar of that which is missing. The piece no longer there. My heart in Heaven is building, waiting for me to be there. I look to that day with wonder, but knowing I must wait. I still have time on this Earth-for pieces of my heart still remain.